Validation: Are We Better Without It?

validation quote

According to dictionary.com validation means to give approval or confirmation.  To me it means seeking approval from others around me which is super self-destructive not to mention completely exhausting!

Throughout my life I can pinpoint times when I wanted validation from family, friends, teachers, bosses and co-workers.  I was the kid who second guessed herself with EVERYTHING whether it be homework, play auditions, softball, basketball, tennis. I was the girlfriend who wanted to be cool and prove how smart, funny and easy-going I am.  I was the employee that went above and beyond to prove myself to superiors to get recognized while others passed me by.  I am a self-sabotager!

I have sabotaged myself in so many situations by second guessing if I was good enough.  I am here to say I am reformed!  Maybe not completely but it is a work in progress.

I have decided to stop putting energy into proving myself, second guessing myself and generally caring what others think.  As the quote says above: The only permission, the only validation, and the only opinion that matters in our quest for greatness is our own.  

As long as we do the right thing by being good people, isn’t that enough?  And if it’s not enough for a friendship, relationship or a job, it’s probably not going to have a future.

I’m curious to know other people’s thoughts on this topic.  Do you think it’s a girl thing?  Is it a Liz thing or do you feel the same?  Your feedback is welcome!

 

 

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